Flat on face at first hurdle

There is nothing quite like being utterly derailed within hours of making fine and fundamental resolutions about your life - it is as if The Universe is sniggering at your pathetic attempts to exert some control over your random existence.

Well Universe. Bite Me.

I will overcome your 24hour bug.  It will not dissuaded me from having a tidy and organised house. Hell no.  I, am on a mission.

But right now, if its okay with you, I'll just stay here, curled up in bed, and wish a slow and painful demise on the person who inflicted this thing on me (can I just point out here that noone else in them my family has it, yet).

There is a chocolate bavarian in the house and I do not want to eat it.  Yes. That sick.

In the meantime here is a before photo of the kitchen.

Yesterday, before my world crashed down upon me, I cleaned the kitchen to within a centimetre of its life, scraped all the spatter crud from the tiles behind the stove, de-crumbed the toaster and everything.  Sadly I didn't get time before the school run to attack the oven.  You can no longer see into the oven through its window, and when I tell people the inside is actually light blue they laugh a lot.  I also didn't get to the cupboards, the pantry, the fridge, the microwave, the floor, or the knife and fork drawer which is growing some kind of black mildew.

I did, however, wipe the swatted fly guts off the window sill.  It was totally gross and made me wish I had not banned insecticides from my house.

The dog disappeared into the clean clothes avalanche and returned with one of those St Bernard brandy containers around his neck and icicles hanging off his ears.  There are things fermenting in the laundry and I don't have the words to describe the kids bathroom.

Yup. Its aaaaaaall good.