Friday, September 30, 2011

So, this is what's been going on...

Hey there my lovelies, ta muchly for hanging about during one of my longest absences in my entire blogging career, and hello to my new followers - resounding silences and blog posts with the dramatic contents of what is about to follow are not usually what Cait Nicholas is all about.  No. Mostly its about doomed attempts at growing things, and bit of kitchenaria, a lot of grumbling on my part, teacups feature as do burnt cakes and NO, even though I am a writer I cannot spot a tyop to save my life.

So here it is...
1. In laws are visiting - life is busy
2. Miss 5 has been diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome - along with a lot of What The Fu**ing on my and hub's part.
3. Grandad is in his last days - or weeks, in usual form the stubborn old thing is doing his own thing at his own speed

I was told, by a psychologist, the other day, that any one of these things would send a frazzled mum over the edge.  And I consider myself so far over the edge just now that not even a vat of red wine would bring me back.  No.  Someone asked me as well, if I'd started the grieving process over Miss 5s diagnosis, to which I replied, that I wasn't sure which grieving process to start first, her or Grandad.

I do not want to talk much about Miss 5, this is not a blog about a kid with a thing, and whilst there will no doubt be reference to the myriad of activities we are undertaking with her, don't expect the subject to come up again.

With Grandad, all I can say is that I know more now about death and the terror of it, than I ever wanted to - and any slim chance that there might have been of my believing in a merciful God, is gone.  Mostly I hover somewhere between wanting to throw up, and wanting to cry until I throw up.

Still. I am here. My sense of humour is still intact. I have so many many people around me to support and listen, I had no idea. No idea. I've even been invited on a pub crawl.

Be back soon. Promise.

10 people love me:

Rachael Johns said...

Aw Cait - I just wanna come over there and hug you. xx

Veronica said...

I am hearing you, loud and clear. Sending love, sending cyber hugs and support too. xx

Sue Webber said...

If ya wanna throw up, throw up, just watch where ya do it! In a busy restaurant say, would not be the place. Try not to think that grandad is dying (I know he is) think of it more as he dragging as much out of life as he can, each day he's still here is a bonus. ((((HUGS))) One good thing about the diagnosis of your daughter living with aspergers is that now you have a reason for her behaviour. When the dust settles you can deal with it then, in the meantime are ya sure ya don't wanna vat of wine??

Sami said...

G**damn sh** what the f***. Am so sorry about every single one of the things you are facing right now. ESPECIALLY the inlaws visiting. That sucks!

Keep that sense of humour Cait--you're my hero. Get in touch if you ever need to rant. Love Ya, Sami.

Caitlyn Nicholas said...

Aw Rach, it'd be wonderful to see you :)

Caitlyn Nicholas said...

Thanks love :)  

Caitlyn Nicholas said...

Sue, you are awesome, thanks for making me laugh out loud :)

Caitlyn Nicholas said...

Thanks Sami :)

Mel said...

Holy hell - you have a lot going on.  Hang in there.

Vanessa said...

Thinking of you gal.  Your strength of character never ceases to amaze me.