My six hundred and fifty first post. Ah! Well, actually its probably more like my 700th or so, but in a moment of paranoia some years ago I deleted a lot of posts from late 2006/early 2007. Posts which I think I have lost (or maybe on an old computer somewhere?? will get hubs to investigate). There was a lot of indiscreet ranting (hell, I was tired, I had a baby and a toddler and book deadlines) AND that was in the days before it was easy to post photos online, so no great loss really.
Aw, sweet little girls playing at the beach... or so it would seem.
Total and utter hell.
Allow me to elaborate...
Miss 4 is extremely tired and over-wrought and is having one screaming tantrum after the other - the best one to date kicked off at 6am and continued until 8, slowed down for an hour and then started up again at 9. She is also refusing to listen to a word I have to say and this has led to her running out into the middle of a road, taking off across a busy carpark - three times, and running away from me at the beach (she would not stop, and was quickly becoming a speck on the horizon, so I had to go after her dragging Miss nearly 6 along with me).
Its got to the point where I am going to buy a wrist-tether for her and we shall wear it in public - yes humiliating for all concerned, but if she thinks that running away is some big joke and that her Mum is just there to be ignored, then I don't think I have a choice. Better that than a run-over child.
Earlier today I took them down to the beach, its cold here at the moment, but we did shoes off with dire warnings about not going near the water as there was a heavy surf. Within five minutes Miss 4 was soaked to the waist and being dragged screaming into the car - I did have dry clothes, thank goodness. We came right home and have spent the rest of the day watching movies, colouring in and 'resting' after we have started the one billionth fight with our sister.
I am tired, frustrated, torn between strangling her and cuddling her and on the verge of tears over my own apparent inability to parent my own child. I mean she's FOUR, how hard can it be?? I am nearly FORTY, why am I reduced to sprinting up the beach bellowing like a lunatic??
I've read all the books, I know all the theory, and nothing is working.
So over this today.