Growing Old Sucks
Growing old sucks. I mean it really sucks. Grandad was doing well, really well, he came out of hospital a few weeks ago and has been at a rehab hospital. He was doing so well that tomorrow he was supposed to go his little unit with the OT person and talk over the realities of living on his own again, and if he could cope. Then, last Wednesday, he had a mild heart-attack, which has of course, set him back, big time.
I was visiting today, I took him a flat white and some anzac biscuits, much appreciated, thankyouverymuchindeed!! He was asleep in the sunshine when I got there, so I just sat and kept him company and knitted.
I couldn't help but overhear the conversation in the bed next to his - everyone is deaf so all intimate details are bellowed, and therefore there aren't many secrets!! The elderly gentleman was being told that he could not go home, and the next stop would be a high-level-of-care nursing home - I don't know his full story, but he is permanently attached to an oxygen mask.
He was desperate not to go, "But I'll die there," he kept saying.
The doctor was calm, but firm, and was very positive about the move. Clearly he'd had this conversation a thousand times before. The gentleman's daughter was there, and was gently backing up the doctor. Her phone rang and she stepped outside the ward to talk, and the gentleman turned to the doctor when she was out of earshot...
"Everyone is so kind," he said. "But you don't realise my family is trying to kill me."
"Your family is trying to help you, they are trying to do what's best," said the doctor.
"They just want to get rid of me, they just want me to die."
My heart broke for the thousandth time, just then. For the gentleman, so helpless and 'fighting against the dying of the light.' For his daughter - who looked as exhausted and stressed as my mother is at the moment - and who is so obviously trying to get her father the best care she can. And just for growing old.
A Balm for my Sole: Choc Mint Balm
When I've got a lot of stuff going on, I tend to take refuge in the kitchen. So expect a lot of making-stuff posts in the near future (the great parsley wine experiment is imminent, I kid you not!!)
Today I rolled up my sleeves and made some of Jackie French's Choc Mint balm. Mostly its for hubs cracked heels (or The Horror - no photo, would not do that to the internet), but it can also be used on skungy elbows and even cracked lips (though I personally wouldn't, all that peppermint essential oil is a bit too minty).
1/2 cup olive oil
1 teaspoon beeswax
2 teaspoons chocolate
1/2 teaspoon mint essential oil
Warm the olive oil and the beeswax until melted
Stir in the chocolate.
Skim off any brown scum.
Add mint oil.
Its messy to use, but smells divine, and the olive oil doesn't do cracked heels any harm (not particularly dramatic results either, mind).